A Season?

   With the NEW FALL TV season upon us, my thoughts have turned to something that has been bothering me for some time now: Exactly what is a TV season?

   My brother and I are TV and film junkies from way back. Show us a screen – the bigger the better – with flickering images, and I’ll show you two extremely happy, old people. Anyway, one day my brother was searching out DVDs at his local library and saw the old 50's TV show "Have Gun Will Travel" in the racks. You must be part of an elite, way over-the-hill gang to even remember this show. But, he is, and he did. Anyway, when he saw the case touted a full season of "Have Gun Will Travel," Bill jumped right on it.

   Back home, with popcorn and a diet soda, he began to watch. He watched a couple of episodes, then took a break. Later, he watched a couple more, took a break. As he continued to watch, he began wondering how many more episodes there were. He finally checked the case again, and realized that this one season had 39– that’s right – 39 episodes. A new episode every week from September through early June. Needless to say, my brother was traumatized, and vowed to never again check out a fifty-year-old TV show on DVD.

   After laughing at his story, I thought, those were the days: There was a winter season and a summer season. The winter season was the better part of a year, then there was the summer season of hated reruns. But you knew what to expect. I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the way, we started getting summer replacements. That was a pretty good idea – a few fresh summer shows, and reruns. I could handle that.

   Today, we have broadcast and cable network programming. All have numerous seasons that commence when "somebody up there" says start. Summer replacements have cliffhanger endings you have to wait nine months to see resolved. And, the NEW FALL SEASON, which now ends in May, instead of June, features repeats throughout.  This confusing mass of entertainment is of unknown duration –five, six, ten weeks – and, just when you decide you really like a show, it’s gone -- season’s over.
   At this point, all I want to know is whether anyone can tell me what constitutes a "season."     Perhaps this is Hollywood’s way of increasing employment opportunities. A celebrity may brag that his or her show has been on for three seasons, but that could be as few as fifteen weeks, total. Okay, well the show’s really been on less than four months.



Should we tell 'em?

   So, here’s what I’d like to see happen. I’d like for the all-knowing guys at the top to find a way to unify the length of these various seasons. Then, tell those of us who buy the products that help pay their salaries when a season will commence, and how many weeks we can expect that "season" to be.    Then (and this has nothing to do with seasons),I want them to stop advertising other shows while the featured program is running. I really hate seeing words and little people scampering across the bottom of my screen.

   Finally, I want the network "volume" police to stop pumping up the volume on commercials. If I have to take a bathroom break, I’ll catch you on the next go-round. I’m already visually challenged, must I lose my hearing, also. CONSPIRACY?